Time Change

Ah, I never remember the time change. Actually, I was thinking it was probably this weekend, but for some reason thought it was Sunday night, not morning.

My stupid phone alarm, which supposedely has a monday through friday wake-up call occasionally decides that weekends qualify under this constraint, and went off at 6:30. To make matters worse, said phone also does not set the time automatically...so it was actually 5:30.

Gotta love technology.

Speaking of technology, have you seen this lovely chesnut?


It's a solar-powered haloween lantern from Fright Catalog. Now, I have to admit it would be really fun to have this for my lawn (if I had a lawn) on Haloween. The big question that comes to mind is: where the heck do you put it the other 364 days of the year? Might be nice to epoxy it to the trunk of the car...

The other thing that I find interesting is this: Does it really matter that something I use once a year is solar powered? Does the pollution saved in batteries actually counter the additional manufacturing pollution it takes to make solar cells? Then again, why can't I just have a cord?

Land Line

So I was sorting through some old files today, and I found a picture that made me miss having a land line phone. It was so much fun to see people's faces when they would pick mine up and try to dial a number.


It was surprising (and unintentionally embarassing) that many people had a really hard time with this one, and I had to dial a number for people more than once. I guess it wasn't the nicest thing to do, but I did love the randomness of it.

Smith Rock

I went with Andreas and his wife Julie to Smith Rock this weekend.

For those of you who do not know of Smith Rock state park, it is a large rock formation (primarily volcanic tuff; compacted/fused ash) that is known throughout the world. It's sort of like a disneyland for climbers. It is located in the middle of Oregon, in the high desert near Bend.


Andreas is a lot of fun to climb with. He's an easy-going, friendly, and interesting guy. He's also a really good climber and knows many of the people that frequent the climbing areas. It's also kinda fun because he helped define a number of the routes in the park, and knows a lot of the people that put them up as well.

At one point his wife Julie was asking a group of climbers what the grade was on the route they were climbing. After she had talked to them, Andreas made the comment "You know you could have asked me, I helped set that route."

We had several highlights during the trip. The first was camping. Andreas has a friend who owns some land right next to the park, so we didn't have to deal with a large camping area filled with cars, and it was about a five minute walk to the trails that led to the climbs. Here is the view from camp.


The night sky views were awesome. Been a while since I've seen the Milky Way and shooting stars. The best my camera could do was the candle in my tent, and then just barely.


It was a little cold the first night. About 20 degrees F for a low. I had my mummy sleeping bag in true mummy mode. I left a hole about 3 inches in diameter for air. It was so cold that when I wanted something outside of my sleeping bag, I stuck my arm out of this small hole and groped for it like some synthetic unicorn worm.

When I woke up the next morning I noticed that there was a layer of frost on the inside of my tent from all of my respiration freezing to the tent walls.

We had a pretty good day of climbing. The daytime weather was perfect (sunny and 60), so it was quite crowded and we had to wait in line for some climbs.


Andreas' dad and both of Julie's parents drove out for the day to watch, and they got a good show. Andreas did Chain Reaction, which is a 5.12 climb that has a significant overhang. This is him on the last move.
It's a great climb to watch, particularly since he ends it by jumping off. The resulting fall (and belayer being pulled off of the ground) is quite a show. His dad didn't know what was coming, and talked about it for some time afterwards. Here are two pictures. The first is him taking the leap, and the second is the final position of him and his wife. Someone else was filming, so I hope to get a copy of that to post as well.



We had an accident later in the day. Julie had a gear mishap, and ended up having to catch a fall by hand (i.e. by grabbing the rope). She lost quite a bit of skin, but fortunately Andreas didn't hit the ground. A little disturbing.


We came close to leaving that night, since Julie was not going to be able to climb, but she convinced us that she could find things to do, so we ended up staying. Fortunately, Saturday night wasn't nearly as cold.

Sunday was a lot more mellow, and one of their friends, Leslie, camped with us that night and joined us for the latter part of the day. That was a nice relief for me, since I was pretty much done climbing by that time, but Andreas still had a number of climbs left in him. The did a couple of climbs in the shady east side of the park, including a couple that had some bouldery kinds of moves. This is Leslie following a route Andreas had just put a rope on:


I did manage to get a decent picture of me on a climb (Lion's Jaw):

Relationship Advice

My roommate, after giving me the following advice, noted that I've been getting some great relationship advice lately. She was talking about how her boyfriend sings made-up songs to her, and that they often involve the term "boobs".

"Now", she said, "it isn't romantic to just sing something like 'I like boobs'."
"No?" I ask, as if this had never occurred to me.
"No. It has to be something like 'I like _your_ boobs'. See, that makes it more personal, thus romantic."

The "great relationship advice" comment was of course a facetious remark based on some other "advice" she was privvy to. I was talking to my friend Jody the other day, and his significant other overheard my name and said something like "Hello Tony!".

Jody, not missing a beats, says "Audrey says 'Hi' (pause) SHUT UP WOMAN, I'M ON THE PHONE!"

He then resumed our conversation with "You may want to write that one down."

We talked little longer, during which time I mentioned a few things about dating.

We said goodbye.

Ten minutes later he called me back and said: "OK, Tony, next piece of advice: _Never_ tell a woman _anything_."
"Really?" I asked.
"Yep. If you do, they'll just have questions, and you don't want that. She wants to know more about this woman you're seeing."
"Ah. I see."

So we talked for a bit longer and satisfied Audrey's curiosity.

"OK, Tony, so what have you learned?" he asked.
"SHUT UP WOMAN, I'M ON THE PHONE!" I replied. "and, never tell a woman _anything_."

"Very good grasshopper." He said.

So, a few days later I was talking to him again. My roommate (who knows Jody and I pretty well) came home. She didn't realize I was on the phone and started talking to me. I told her I was talking to Jody. She said "Hi, Jody!", to which I replied "Sarah says 'Hi'....SHUT UP WOMAN, I'M ON THE PHONE!"

"Ah, grasshopper. You have snatched the pebble from my hand." was Jody's reply.

Spiritual Matters

Some recent conversations have challenged me to think about my current claim of being an atheist. I always considered the term to be appropriate, but I recently discovered that other people have a different definition of the term than I was using. You see, my own definition was cenetered around the concenpt of "One who does not believe in God", which jives with the dictionary definition, but once again I have been reminded that we don't all define words the same way, since withing this simple definition lurks a bit of potential ambiguity.

The fact that God is capitalized indicates that we are talking about the single-god theory of the universe, which in American (and much of western) culture tends to aim people's mind at Christianity. I resolved my internal conflicts about belief in that system a while back, which is why I came to claim the atheist moniker.

Even then I felt that the term might not be strong enough, as reflected in one of my email quotes (I have a program that inserts them randomly) which is:

When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, "Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?".

-- Quentin Crisp

I hadn't even considered that the atheist moniker would conjure up notions that I was no longer curious about the mysteries of the Universe. Where do we come from? Where are we going? What is the purpose of my life? What happens when we die? How do I integrate spiritual experiences into my world view?

I still explore these, but I feel that my time is best spent on roads other than the christian one. I've followed that one far enough to know it is not for me. I've had as many spiritual experiences in a few months of meditation classes as I have spending nearly 25 years in church.

I see christianity and many other religions the same way now. A set of good underlying principles: Treat people the way you want to be treated, etc. They work and have been time-tested. I just don't give much credence to the "why" that they supply.

My interest in physics was inspired by the idea that through progressive study one could come to understand how the universe works. Wow, what a powerful and seductive idea! I think much of the popular culture's interest in physics is related to the same romantic notion: that a science which is so successful at controlling and predicting things must have some deeper answers and meaning.

I still love physics. There is so much that is beautiful and fascinating there, yet what I ultimately found in terms of spirituality was not what I thought I would find. You see, I realized that I was looking for a concrete answer to the questions that start with "Why". The deeper you get into physics, the more you realize that you have to let go of that notion.

Quantum mechanics has no "why", or for that matter even "how". It deals with things like "when", "where", and "how much". The second you try to ascribe a deeper meaning (i.e. an explanation to the question "why does it work that way?") a contradiction arises. You are left with a series of equations that work and can be tested over and over again, but the more you dig the more you find things that are not what you wanted in terms of philosophy.

It's actaully a lovely parallel to the idea of faith. Someone tells you the equations are true. You work a couple of problems and see that it works. This builds up into a belief system. I believe the equations work. Over years and years of re-applying the same principles and equations you build up an abiding faith that the equations are true, and pass that along to someone else.

Yet underneath it all the fact remains: you don't know why. The universe just works the way it works.

Perhaps this in itself is some indication that there are higher powers than ourselves. We ascribe a high value to our notion of intelligence and cognition because it sets us apart, yet even with this stunning ability we fail to grasp the "why" of it all. We seek to expand our minds in the hope that all will suddenly become clear. We sometimes follow those who claim or appear to know the way because we have not found it ourselves.

So in the end I'm happy seeking a better understanding of myself and how I affect the lives of others. Sometimes that quest happens through interaction with things that are considered spiritual. I've had wonderful experiences outdoors (my first trip to the Redwoods was one of the most spiritual experiences of my life). I've had very interesting experiences in meditation. More often I find that I gain better insight through conversations with people.

In any case, if it integrates well with my life and makes me happier, then I integrate it. If not, I leave it be. Perhaps someone else has a use for it.

So now I'm back to terminology. I tend to dislike the term agnostic, because to me it has christian overtones (or maybe it's just that it encourages christians to "help you" make up your mind). But now I realize that the term atheist may be too strong.

One of my favorite Monty Python skits involves this crazy executive who sequentially fires people around a table, first for liking his idea and being a "yes man", then for saying that his ideas are bad, then for being indecisive. Then he comes to the fourth man:

Larry	Right you. The one in the middle, what do you think?
Second Writer	(panic) Er... er...
Larry	Come on!
Second Writer	Splunge.
Larry	Did he say splunge?
First and Third Writers	Yes.
Larry	What does splunge mean?
Second Writer	It means ... it's a great-idea-but-possibly-not-and-I'm-not-being-indecisive!

I think when someone asks me about religion, perhaps I should stick with "splunge". It's sort of like being agnostic, without the western religious overtones.

Out of it

Wow, I'm a bit off lately.

I think part of it is too much packed into small amounts of time. I went climbing twice this weekend, rode a decent number of miles on my bike, finished homework for two classes, and tried to make some progress with my email software project at work. I also managed two dates, though I'm not so sure the quality of the second one was all that great.

Emre just came in and told me that I had already implemented a test case that I asked him to write. I didn't even remember doing it. I think I need to take a walk this afternoon and air out my head.

Couch Frisbee

My roommate and I have invented a new zero-exercise game: couch frisbee. Here is how it works: You sit on opposite ends of a couch, chat about nothing in particular, and toss a frisbee the two foot span between you.

We did this for two hours last night.

Of course, when you have a mis-throw and the frisbee rolls away from the couch, you just stare at it in much the same way as a dog whose favorite toy has suddenly landed on the other side of the fence.

Strange Dreams

OK, so what does it mean when you wake up and all you can remember is that your dream had something to do with an altar, ritualistic sex, and a toaster?

Probably that I'm reading too much non-fiction that examines existential philosophy of the digital age (Levy's "Scrolling Forward") and sexually charged fiction (Irving's "A Window for One Year") at the same time...that, and I like toast.

Newspapers

I recently got into a discussion about popular media. I mentioned that I didn't read the papers, and mentioned that I didn't really want to read about how some guy beat up his wife, or some guy robbed a quicky mart. The reply I got was "but what about the women who are getting beaten?"

Well, at the time it seemed a good point, and I couldn't exactly express why that point of view didn't work for me. Am I just too flippant about the world around me? Do I not care about women's rights? Don't we need to be informed about what is going on in our world?

Now that I've had time to reflect, it occurs to me that what bothers me about this sort of news is that when an issue is brought up, it is done so in an anecdotal sense of individual example with stress on the sensational, and not on the facts.

You see, I don't care to know the details of who hit who, what their names were, how the police got involved, how the neighbors feel, etc. It bears no relation to my daily life nor society in any tangible and meaningful sense, other than to tell a story: it is entertainment of marginally social value. I can get better from good fiction, and it doesn't make me as sad.

What I would love to see in a news publication is news presented in a format that allows me to make a difference in my immediate world. I don't care that John hit Sally (or vice versa) specifically because it is a past event that is already being handled by the current laws. It can only lead to reactionary policy that is driven by the emotions of the story. Not a good way to do anything.

We end up concentrating our energy on politicians who have to summarize a suggested solution that will fit in a sound bite because we end up so uninformed on the issue as to be unable to discuss it in a public forum: we lack the terminology, background, and concrete data. A politician can't present a good solution because we are too uneducated to understand it without that person writing a book on it. A catchy sound bite becomes the only option for the distracted (but entertained) masses.

Instead of a John beat Sally story, I would love to see articles that gather information from peer reviewed sources and present them in a way that helps me make informed decisions about things like policy and law.

I don't want just statistics; I want information about the kinds of things that are happening (not anecdotal instances), what is currently being done about them, and some reasonable evaluation of how well that is working. Does jail time stop the beatings, or is treatment more likely to help? What solutions do other countries pursue, and how well do they work?

We occasionally see stories with this flavor, but I have yet to see one that I find credible outside of a select few magazines and research journals. Credibility, unfortunately, doesn't seem to sell well.